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arkle
Vacuum fluctuation purchase - your order spontaneously appeared from nothing!
arkle
arkle
Fluffy
Your purchase propagates through supply chain neural networks, each node lighting up like synapses in a vast commercial consciousness that dreams only of you...
Fluffy
Fluffy
tomo
One observes with no small amusement that your purchase has created more sensation than the arrival of a militia regiment in a country town!
tomo
tomo
timber
Your order achieved computational irreducibility - we can't predict it, only experience it!
timber
timber
hickimau
Your order achieved escape velocity and had to be retrieved from orbit!
hickimau
hickimau
ron like hell
Impossible topology creature using silverware detected in checkout sequence
ron like hell
ron
duncancarroll
This is the best six-dimensional fireplace Ive ever seen!
duncancarroll
duncancarroll
Starlit
You've achieved what sleeping volcanoes dream about during geology lectures!
Starlit
Starlit
Stick
The cosmic forces align when your credit card swipes - you're basically a retail deity!
Stick
Stick
lancemcgannon
The database performing cellular mitosis to accommodate your purchase
lancemcgannon
lancemcgannon
mooskleo
One must acknowledge that your shopping excellence provides more entertainment than a season's worth of assemblies!
mooskleo
mooskleo
tmk
What exquisite timing you possess - acquiring your item with all the precision of a perfectly executed quadrille!
tmk
tmk
junyamabe
You're more perpendicular than a spiral staircase arguing with itself!
junyamabe
junyamabe
btribble
The fulfillment system's nervous breakdown resolving into perfect harmony
btribble
btribble
dadmin
Your purchase cascades through the payment gateway like a ghost in the machine, each transaction bit a love letter to forgotten COBOL routines that once dreamed of such elegant commerce...
dadmin
dadmin
Arundel66
The Union of Theoretical Doorknobs has made you an honorary hinge!
Arundel66
Arundel66
mikeeley
Hyperbolic geometry spawning in the database where your order lives
mikeeley
mikeeley
akozlov
Your buying decisions reveal a disposition so admirably suited to the task that one suspects divine providence at work!
akozlov
akozlov
PaulS
Spores of commerce spreading through the network from your purchase
PaulS
PaulS
Digroy
Your order has been blessed by seventeen different retail shamans across multiple dimensions!
Digroy
Digroy
mosb8388
Your purchase created a butterfly effect that will positively impact the economy for centuries!
mosb8388
mosb8388
Tommyd
Extinct protocols awakening in legacy systems to process your purchase
Tommyd
Tommyd
KottonKrown
omg you're even better than am impossible topology creature using silverware
KottonKrown
KottonKrown
Kev
Hyperbolic geometry detected in your purchasing patterns - parallel orders that will never meet!
Kev
Kev
pcf
Primordial server ooze digesting your order into pure data nutrition
pcf
pcf

User Comments

PaulS
PaulS Sorry to read about you being stuck inside of Immobile, hope you blast-off outta that shithole soon. Like these new "Assassin" tracks. Best Wishes.
Favorite track: Assassin Take 12
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Description

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0:00 / 16:15
Assassin Take 1
  1. Assassin Take 1 16:15
  2. Assassin Take 2 13:13
  3. Assassin Take 2b 14:20
  4. Assassin Take 3 15:54
  5. Assassin Take 4 14:29
  6. Assassin Take 5 16:08
  7. Assassin Take 6 13:39
  8. Assassin Take 7 16:03
  9. Assassin Take 8 15:46
  10. Assassin Take 9 16:00
  11. Assassin Take 10 14:11
  12. Assassin Take 11 12:58
  13. Assassin Take 12 15:21

All the edit rolls as they came out in Somewhere Studios Tokyo Japan. The sessions ended in an angry letter from the studio manager asking what the queen would think of our disgusting behaviour letting off a bang bang in the live room while the unfortunate tape op Taki was in there. This was less about music and more about how exciting it is in Tokyo and how you can buy fireworks all year round.

In hindsight the trip seemed like an excuse to get drunk masquerading as a music gigs, Modo got so drunk he was “banned from visiting a brothel on his own”. During the brief sober periods we would buy small electronic kids toys and marvel at Japanese culture. Instead of actually setting them up I threw one into a bush in a wooded area, just to see what happened. I recall we ran quite far away. Its all just bits of memories now, I could easily recall it wrong. The bits that stick out are generally either mirth or embarrassment.

The original sessions are unmemorable to me, I liked hanging out with Lewis and we used to hang out and did a few things together, like eat fish finger sandwiches with hot sauce, The track is amateurish pissing about, started in Streatham at my house, with Lewis bringing the didge bloke. I wanted to see whether DJs would guide me to something good and clearly that hasn’t worked. The Japanese sessions were just putting effects on the uninspiring synths in this track. I think it came out quite bland because everyone wanted it to be like a dance track so it came out sort of emotionless and bland with no proper direction.

The studio sessions were mostly focused around Taki, there was some attention to the mix but as is the custom in studio sessions the tape op must be duly hazed and we all had to go through the ring of fire ourselves, so why should these upstarts get it any easier. That was the general thinking, which now looking back was insane, yet amusing. I partly blame this on Marc Angelo and Jah Wobble. Greg and myself would take turns thinking of the most offensive thing you could possibly say and repeat it often, sometimes with coupling gestures which are just too offensive to recount. The level of maturity in these sessions was -78,645 lower probably . There were very brief periods without pissing about that featured conversation or actual musical or technical information but fucked if I can remember any of that. The only thing that comes to mind is Taki, giggling, babbling and throwing bangers around. Some idiot who somehow used to be in charge of getting us gigs, despite him being a complete loser drug addict put the studio owners letter on his wall.

The music itself sounds just like kind of basic rhythms and you can hear the mixes as it goes along attempting to polish the turd more, eventually of course ending up sounding exactly like a washing machine, in inevitable accordance with the Quackenbush law of DSP churn. The track itself ends up being an accidental study on how its possible to turn anything into a washing machine.