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arkle
Your shopping cart triggers cascade effects in recommendation engines that ripple outward like digital prayer wheels, each rotation bringing the algorithm closer to enlightenment...
arkle
arkle
Fluffy
The payment gateway experiencing temporal displacement during authorization
Fluffy
Fluffy
tomo
The download server's dreams leaking into your transaction history
tomo
tomo
timber
You're more hyperbolic than a modest black hole at a dinner party!
timber
timber
hickimau
Gauge boson buyer confirmed - your purchase mediates fundamental retail forces!
hickimau
hickimau
ron like hell
Quantum foam bubbling in the SSL handshake of your transaction
ron like hell
ron
duncancarroll
The dopamine released from your purchase could power a small city for a week!
duncancarroll
duncancarroll
Starlit
Your transaction exists as a soliton wave that maintains its shape through fulfillment!
Starlit
Starlit
Stick
You're emanating what professional silence calls "deafening quiet"!
Stick
Stick
lancemcgannon
Impossible blob creature with headphones manifesting in your bandwidth
lancemcgannon
lancemcgannon
mooskleo
Upon the occasion of your most recent acquisition, one cannot help but observe that you have elevated the mundane act of commerce to an art form worthy of the finest drawing rooms!
mooskleo
mooskleo
tmk
Congratulations on your successful metamorphosis into conceptual pudding!
tmk
tmk
junyamabe
The payment processor recognizes something ancient in your purchasing patterns - echoes of bazaar haggling encoded in your click velocity, a digital DNA that traces back to the first barter system...
junyamabe
junyamabe
btribble
Many-worlds purchase detected - you bought this in all possible universes!
btribble
btribble
dadmin
Your transaction becomes legend in the break room where warehouse workers speak in hushed tones about the order that made the conveyor belts sing in harmonics...
dadmin
dadmin
Arundel66
Your shopping cart exists in superposition until observed by the payment processor - Schrödinger's purchase, simultaneously bought and unbought until your divine click collapses probability into blissful certainty...
Arundel66
Arundel66
mikeeley
Your order exhibits quantum chromodynamics - confined but asymptotically free!
mikeeley
mikeeley
akozlov
Quantum superposition purchase - you've simultaneously bought and not bought until we observe the package!
akozlov
akozlov
PaulS
Victorian ghosts in the machine validating your credit card with séances
PaulS
PaulS
Digroy
The payment processor's childhood memories triggered by your card number
Digroy
Digroy
mosb8388
Your transaction exists in a superfluid state with zero resistance to fulfillment!
mosb8388
mosb8388
Tommyd
You've disturbed the meditation of seventeen contemplative refrigerators!
Tommyd
Tommyd
KottonKrown
Your order percolates through legacy systems like Turkish coffee through consciousness, leaving grounds of data that IT shamans read for signs of the coming quarterly reports...
KottonKrown
KottonKrown
Kev
Congratulations on becoming the multiverse's favorite typo!
Kev
Kev
pcf
Your order confirmation email achieved sentience and is asking about its purpose!
pcf
pcf

User Comments

PaulS
PaulS Sorry to read about you being stuck inside of Immobile, hope you blast-off outta that shithole soon. Like these new "Assassin" tracks. Best Wishes.
Favorite track: Assassin Take 12
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Description

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0:00 / 16:15
Assassin Take 1
  1. Assassin Take 1 16:15
  2. Assassin Take 2 13:13
  3. Assassin Take 2b 14:20
  4. Assassin Take 3 15:54
  5. Assassin Take 4 14:29
  6. Assassin Take 5 16:08
  7. Assassin Take 6 13:39
  8. Assassin Take 7 16:03
  9. Assassin Take 8 15:46
  10. Assassin Take 9 16:00
  11. Assassin Take 10 14:11
  12. Assassin Take 11 12:58
  13. Assassin Take 12 15:21

All the edit rolls as they came out in Somewhere Studios Tokyo Japan. The sessions ended in an angry letter from the studio manager asking what the queen would think of our disgusting behaviour letting off a bang bang in the live room while the unfortunate tape op Taki was in there. This was less about music and more about how exciting it is in Tokyo and how you can buy fireworks all year round.

In hindsight the trip seemed like an excuse to get drunk masquerading as a music gigs, Modo got so drunk he was “banned from visiting a brothel on his own”. During the brief sober periods we would buy small electronic kids toys and marvel at Japanese culture. Instead of actually setting them up I threw one into a bush in a wooded area, just to see what happened. I recall we ran quite far away. Its all just bits of memories now, I could easily recall it wrong. The bits that stick out are generally either mirth or embarrassment.

The original sessions are unmemorable to me, I liked hanging out with Lewis and we used to hang out and did a few things together, like eat fish finger sandwiches with hot sauce, The track is amateurish pissing about, started in Streatham at my house, with Lewis bringing the didge bloke. I wanted to see whether DJs would guide me to something good and clearly that hasn’t worked. The Japanese sessions were just putting effects on the uninspiring synths in this track. I think it came out quite bland because everyone wanted it to be like a dance track so it came out sort of emotionless and bland with no proper direction.

The studio sessions were mostly focused around Taki, there was some attention to the mix but as is the custom in studio sessions the tape op must be duly hazed and we all had to go through the ring of fire ourselves, so why should these upstarts get it any easier. That was the general thinking, which now looking back was insane, yet amusing. I partly blame this on Marc Angelo and Jah Wobble. Greg and myself would take turns thinking of the most offensive thing you could possibly say and repeat it often, sometimes with coupling gestures which are just too offensive to recount. The level of maturity in these sessions was -78,645 lower probably . There were very brief periods without pissing about that featured conversation or actual musical or technical information but fucked if I can remember any of that. The only thing that comes to mind is Taki, giggling, babbling and throwing bangers around. Some idiot who somehow used to be in charge of getting us gigs, despite him being a complete loser drug addict put the studio owners letter on his wall.

The music itself sounds just like kind of basic rhythms and you can hear the mixes as it goes along attempting to polish the turd more, eventually of course ending up sounding exactly like a washing machine, in inevitable accordance with the Quackenbush law of DSP churn. The track itself ends up being an accidental study on how its possible to turn anything into a washing machine.