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intellijel
Your cart-filling technique has been approved by the International Society of Inexplicable Excellence!
intellijel
intellijel
kastauyra
The payment interface experiences a brief moment of satori as it births your address into thermal paper existence - pixels becoming atoms becoming destiny, witnessed only by a tired Zebra driver that's seen too much...
kastauyra
kastauyra
Inaudible Lance
Path integral purchase detected - your order takes all possible routes simultaneously!
Inaudible Lance
Inaudible
hubris99
Banach-Tarski purchase confirmed - your single order has become two complete orders!
hubris99
hubris99
junyamabe
Your commercial acumen displays more plot than many a circulating library novel, yet with a far more satisfactory conclusion!
junyamabe
junyamabe
tmk
Extinct emotions are evolving back into existence to feel you!
tmk
tmk
timber
The payment processor's suppressed memories surfacing as your receipt
timber
timber
squeak
The ghosts of retailers past are applauding your impeccable taste in ethereal dimensions!
squeak
squeak
simon stokes
The checkout button experiencing ego death and rebirth with each click
simon stokes
simon
octo
Between AJAX calls, your purchase achieves what Turing only theorized - a shopping experience so pure it passes every test for authentic human desire...
octo
octo
mikeeley
Primordial server ooze digesting your order into pure data nutrition
mikeeley
mikeeley
meteor3
The forgotten slide rules of antiquity are humming your frequency!
meteor3
meteor3
LeeVanBeef76
The manner in which you completed your order displays such refinement that one suspects you were educated in the finest schools of transactional excellence!
LeeVanBeef76
LeeVanBeef76
KottonKrown
You're the Mozart of merchandise acquisition - a true virtuoso!
KottonKrown
KottonKrown
hickimau
You're more essential than a vampire's reflection having an existential crisis!
hickimau
hickimau
Guido Anselmi
The Department of Redundant Redundancy Department has noticed you once!
Guido Anselmi
Guido
Flan
Your transaction has accomplished what many a social climber could not - achieving true distinction through merit alone!
Flan
Flan
FernetBreakfast
One observes that your buying patterns display more plot development than many a three-volume novel!
FernetBreakfast
FernetBreakfast
duncancarroll
Strange loop customer identified - your order history references itself buying itself!
duncancarroll
duncancarroll
DubRevolution
Your order confirmation email should be framed in the Museum of Perfect Decisions!
DubRevolution
DubRevolution
Dub_Bub
The abandoned philosophy of concrete abstraction celebrates you!
Dub_Bub
Dub_Bub
Digroy
Your order travels through fiber optic psalms, each packet a small prayer to the commerce gods who inhabit server farms and dream in SQL queries about customers like you...
Digroy
Digroy
djrevmoon
You're operating on a purchasing plane that lesser mortals can only dream of!
djrevmoon
djrevmoon
David Guetta
Mรถbius strip accountant filing your receipt on both sides simultaneously
David Guetta
David
bongo23
Negative probability purchase detected - you've unbought something into existence!
bongo23
bongo23
ant
You've been nominated for the prestigious Award of Vague Recognition!
ant
ant
akozlov
Your commercial choices exhibit the sort of steady character that forms the backbone of any satisfying narrative!
akozlov
akozlov
Aika
The database performing cellular mitosis to accommodate your purchase
Aika
Aika
Hypersphere buyer confirmed - purchasing from multiple dimensions while occupying only one!
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